Something I’ve noticed is that when I forget my feminine practices, I am more easily pulled off my center. It’s essential to stay embodied and heart-connected to yourself—especially during times of stress and transition. Embrace it; breathe, and surrender to what is. It’s all part of evolving and transforming.

We all need reminders to pause and find the beauty in the moment, the beauty before us. Here are some reboot hacks to revive your Goddess-ness.

Nourish yourself. A goddess is in sync with the natural rhythms of nature. She knows all children are her children and that the earth, air, and water are sacred. She fiercely protects the environment and is the voice of the disenfranchised. She is also the queen of self-care. She rises early and hydrates often. Start your day with a glass of warm lemon water and walk barefoot in the grass in the early morning sunlight to savor the new day. Make a point of getting at least twenty minutes of exercise every day and massaging your lovely breasts.

Don’t spread yourself too thin. A goddess picks her battles. She understands that any action has an equal and opposite reaction and that forces come in pairs. She chooses causes she can get behind knowing that other goddesses will be doing the same. Some write letters, some knit pink hats. Some raise conscious children.

Practice active listening. A goddess controls her tongue and knows when to hold it. Concentrate on listening to understand the position of those who disagree with you, rather than mentally preparing for your next rebuttal. Take a full breath before you respond. Conscious and compassionate listening takes an open heart, a focused mind, and lots of practice.

Renew intimacy with those you love. A goddess makes her relationships a priority. She says I love you with intention. She lets the words flow through her. She offers touch. She knows she is not her emotions, but allows her body to fill with them. She never forgets that the three keys to being a goddess are empathy, compassion, and vulnerability.

Have a gratitude practice. A goddess shines. Her energy is palpable on even the dreariest of days because she practices gratitude. She is grateful for her family, her community, her critters and the simple pleasures in life. She bows and gives thanks. Take it one step further and follow up your gratitudes with a giving practice. You know, those random acts of kindness!

Process negative emotions. Emotions affect every living cell in the body. A goddess knows how to re-channel her anger and pain. Identify the emotion and turn toward the unpleasant feeling. Take a breath and accept what is present knowing all emotions are impermanent. Dispel or dissolve the negativity with ecstatic movement, sex, a fierce workout, a smiling meditation or the six healing sounds. Or do like my friend Amy and smash plates in the backyard. Note: Picking them up is also part of the practice.

Be a Wisdom Seeker. Goddesses learn from other goddesses. Have teachers to turn to when you feel overwhelmed. Don’t separate or isolate; ask for support when you need it.

Let Go. Hanging on to resentments weighs us down. Goddesses choose forgiveness and love. They know holding on to grudges only hurts the one hanging on to them. Release unhealthy attachments, be it a relationship, a habit, or and anything else that is no longer in alignment with who you are, or what you wish to create in the world. Take time to reflect and heed the words of the master poet, David Whyte; “Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet confinement of your aloneness to learn anything or anyone that does not bring you alive is too small for you.” Goddesses trust their intuition and follow their unfettered hearts.

Nourish your body and return to the den often to replenish your feminine spirit. Find time to explore pleasure and celebrate love. Spend time with children and elders. Pet puppies, smell flowers and dance. Set healthy boundaries. Respect your needs. Feel your feelings. Speak your truth. Connect to Mother Nature. Smile and make love. Howl at the moon and make room for your wildness. Be fueled by love, not fear. Stay grateful and grounded. All of these fan your goddess power and enable you to actualize the enormous potential that resides within you.

 Flow and go.

 Keep it sexy. Make it sacred.



Bella LaVey 

Fetish Girl: A memoir of Sex, Domination and Motherhood

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